Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Back to work - part 2

Because of my infertility and the long, LONG road it took to actually get pregnant and stay pregnant and then take home LIVE babies (Dr G always told me “our goal is a live, take-home baby” which is so true, not just getting pregnant), I initially thought I’d want nothing more than to stay at home and gaze into their adorable little faces.

My husband who knows me SOOOOOOOOO well said to me around the 6th or 7th month that he didn’t think my basic personality would change just because we were having babies or because of the infertility.

(My basic personality is a highly-driven, go-getter type one, always achieving, etc.)

Since I was high on the preggy hormones I said I really didn’t know what I wanted to do but "we’ll have to see".

Then my fabulous boss (ML, don’t show him that post!) told me once after a meeting that our Big Boss wanted to know if I was coming back to work after the babies were born.

I told him I had no choice because we need the money. Right.

I thought I should be honest with him about my feelings (since he’s so great and all) so I said that I’d been thinking of going half day once they were here and he said he had no problem with that as I probably would still be as productive!

It’s probably true since I do talk a lot of nonsense during work times. I am that person in the team who is all about the team lunches, going for coffees, checking up on the sick people, asking after the family, etc. But only after the work is done!!!! Am highly task-structured.

I did tell him that I just wasn’t sure how this whole baby thing would work out and would he please just go with the flow because isn’t that how my whole baby journey has been?!

Of course he laughed and said yes.

So the babies came home, reality set in and even now that they’re cute as buttons, I realised that my husband is right – my personality has NOT changed.

I still want to work. I still NEED to work.

I still want to interact with clients.

I work for an insurance company as a Relationship and Operations Manager in a business development team.

This position is absolutely perfect for my ESTJ-ness. Perfect.

About 40 – 50% of the time I deal with people – clients, internal people, team members on different projects, and the rest of the time I faff around. Only joking! I get the deals that we sign up implemented in the company so the things can start making us money.

There are lots of departments I deal with, hundreds of tasks and I’m great at co-ordinating all those details and getting things done by bossing people about. In a nice way, of course, but I don’t stand nonsense, because I’m harder on me by FAR than I am on other people.

I know beyond a shadow of doubt that I will be a better mother to them if I get out of the house on a daily basis so I can miss them and look forward to coming back home.

Does that sound weird?

The half day thing (5 hours a day) would be great as I’d be stimulated, nicely stressed, interacting with people, etc. and still have time to play with babies, cook, and have time with D.

Only thing is because they’re so expensive, we can’t afford the half day salary. I checked and nearly had a heart attack when I saw the amount!!!

So I’m thinking of a 6 hour a day scenario… if my company even does that sort of thing. Otherwise will have to work full day (am not prepared to be stressed about money) and try and split up the day – 6 hours in office, 1,5 – 2 at night when babies are asleep.

Will have to make a meeting with my boss and the big boss to discuss all these things sometime this month.

Lots more to say but again, time is up as this is my 30-minute post for the blog challenge.


  1. Everyone is different in their desire to work vs. stay home. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with either one. I could never work another day in my life and be completely happy. That will not happen, but oh how I wish it could! =) Plus, you will be able to do many fun things because you will have money!

  2. Do what makes you happy b/c it will inevitably make you a better Mom. I wish I could work part-time, but the district that I teach with doesn't offer that right now. That's why I tutor privately! It's hard when you don't have an outlet! Love love love the babies' hands!!!

  3. Ah, yes, the basic personality, the TYPE ONE, never goes away. Because I work for myself, I work as much as I can when. And no, it totally does not sound weird that you think you will be a better mother if you can step away for a few hours. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I savor my moments with my kids. I also know that I am more patient and kinder than if I was with them all day. Now, kick butt! :)

  4. You think I have time to organize! LOL! I'll gladly show and tell. Good for you going back. Time away from diapers and bottles is always good. As much as I currently despise my job and hate to leave the girls I really enjoy being around adults (if you can cal them that). I just hope you have the energy cause sure don't! Working so little has left me horrible lazy.

  5. I agree that a happy mommy makes you a better mommy. I pray you figure it all out!

  6. It doesn't sound wierd at all. I'm an ENTJ and I need to work for my sanity too. Plus I like knowing if anything ever happens to my DH, I can take care of our family financially. I hope that doesn't sound morbid!

    I do love it though when I can have days off to enjoy the babies!!!


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