Friday, June 04, 2010

So, yesterday

I had a terrible day even though there weren't many terrible things that happened.

Does that make any sense?

Seriously, this electricity thing threw me for a loop.

I'm actually doing that marketing thing and saying "R9 881" instead of "R10 000" because it makes me freak out less but it's just the same, isn't it?

I even cried a bit.

And then had the start of a headache...

How I know when I really need help....... I journal :)

I'm not the journalling sort but somehow I needed to get the noise out of my head so I wrote 4 PAGES of mind noise.

When D got home, I was watching The Bold and The Beautiful.

He took one look at me and said, "have you been crying?"


I just handed him the journal and said, "read".

So he did. And then announced that he's worried about me.

This is not me, to not have any fight.

I've just come from a meeting with my boss and client and while the boys went for a quick loo break, I phoned a friend because we are going to a woman's thing tomorrow at church (no, it's not that friend, it's M whose baby was also in NICU) and needed to finalise times and so on.

My wonderful boss heard me say to M, "I was crying yesterday" blah blah and said, "Marcia, what's wrong?"

Gave him a quick low-down. He thought it was the money I was freaked about.

It is and it isn't.

I will HAPPILY pay what I'm supposed to but I don't trust their systems and no matter what we do, nothing happens that's supposed to. I don't know that they've charged me properly.

Back to yesterday.

Shortly after the B & B ended and D & I spoke, the headache increased in its throbbing and intensity and it was all I could do to undress, get into pj's and into bed (probably around 7pm).

Similar to this headache I had.

Woke around 1 pm for Connor and then slept through until 8pm (yes, I was very late for work).

There's no good end to this post.

D and I decided to give the tenants notice so we can be 100% sure that it's just us generating any electricity usage and we'll be paying the amount off til they recon our account.

If that amount is valid, I am going to have a nervous breakdown... I can't bear the thought of my lovely (restored) savings account paying for ELECTRICITY.

Jhb people - what do you pay for electricity these days? I assume you have "normal" accounts and that your meters are actually read.

P.S. It's the babies' dedication on Sunday. I'm looking forward to seeing my friends!

P.P.S. Connor's turned into a sulky teenager so I'm adding some happy pics of him to remember the baby he used to be :)


  1. Sounds like a rough day. It is so hard when unexpected expenses come up. I'm always nervous about money and I am not nearly as good as you are about budgeting and tracking. Why do kids turn into teenagers whenever we want them to be happy for us to lift up our moods? It's horrible for me to say but I think little boys are harder in that department - at least it is true for Ned v. Penny. Hang in there - this too shall pass.

  2. All I can say is that I'm sorry. I function at a high level for long periods of time, and then find myself knocked down by something seemingly trivial. It's probably a sign that you need to take some time to take care of yourself.

    Please do. Take care of yourself. I'm an e-mail away if you need to vent.

  3. Mommy Esq, gosh, i hope not a little boy thing. I took some time earlier (one on one) and was rewarded with some lovely smiles from Connor. I even took pics because who knows how long it'll be before I get smiles again :)

    Sadia, that sounds exactly like what's happening to me. I crack and then I know I need to slow down, take a step back and take care of me.

    I'm just finishing a procedure doc (so I can delegate some of the business work to my VA), sending that off and then I'm jumping into bed with my book.

  4. You sound like you need a really long sleep and luckily it's Friday... and hopefully you get some rest... Electricity has gone through the roof... With no tumble drying and laundry only every other day... no extra light bulbs - we all sit in the same room to read in the evening... every possible saving... it is still off the scale and it is going up again... I see a lot of sandwich suppers in our distant future.

  5. Sounds like you're ready for a wee holiday, my dear ;)

    And I get your frustration over the power bill. Seriously. I'd be wound up to the max over it, too. That's enormous. Like a family holiday enormous. Surely you have the right to question how they've calculated their bill? What's in your contract? If they were hopeless at explaining, I'd be taking them to the low level court here to prove the bill. The amount of your bill seems dragging it out and costing them in the process seem so worthwhile. So frustrating hon.

    On a brighter note, I hope that Sunday goes fantastically - can't wait to hear about it :)

  6. You can pull through this I'm sure :) Just look at all the wonderful things you've already accomplished. I know it's awful but it's only money. Call the company, see if they can help and understand your situation. If that doesn't work, how about a mediator? Can you change electricity companies in the mean time? Can they put you on a payment plan? Remember what is important and focus on that. :) You will get through this!

  7. Hope things are going better now. :)


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